This Tuesday began early when my phone buzzed, my cat walked on my head as a reminder to feed her, and a dozen roses were delivered to my door. The phone calls, texts, emails and Facebook birthday wishes began pouring in. Thank you all! It is a bit surprising that after surviving this many of them, they are still as electric as they were when I was small. So much attention given to one person, just because they were born! The feelings and energies have changed though, it’s no longer about the gifts or the party (not totally, anyway), it’s about friendship, children, closeness. It’s about gratitude, and perhaps it always was, I just didn’t realize it back then.
My life is comfortable and comforting, even though there is nothing routine about it. Schedules and activities change often, and life has a tinge of surprise and awe, every day, even if that’s just a matter of the different vegetables I find at the green market. I feel a deep sense of contentment, I strive to learn, and I have a tenuous and absorbing connection to my past and my future, like a tightrope of time. This tightrope is home, exhilaration, and the full circle of my (everyone’s?) existence. It is soothing and inspiring. It is wholeness.
And that is the feeling I most feel today – whole; connected and individualistic, creative and practical, incorporative (is this a word?) of what lasts and what’s just begun. My ability to accept allowances has grown and I am zestfully enthusiastic to be alive. Taking a moment to consider one’s birth-day (and all that may imply) can engender powerful emotion.
Once again, thank you to all the wonderful people who took time out of their day to send birthday texts, emails, and make phone calls (I must have received 10 since I began this post!), you have truly aided in making this one Happy Birthday!!!