When I lost my parents, my voice found an authenticity that had been forfeited or quieted enough to be unheard. My parents’, near the end of their lives, had a profound impact on unlocking a quintessential part of me. This piece was the embodiment of something so primal that I questioned how to navigate my close relationships as well as with whom to continue relationships at all.
I considered personal, family, and societal patterns. I considered my heart. I was determined to (re)find myself in the mix. Confronted with the typically detached manner in which death is dealt with in our country, I knew that in order to continue living with myself as a daughter and human being, that I would have to find my own path through this under-attended and massive endeavor. My motivation was partially selfish – I wanted to survive without guilt and regret – and partially altruistic – I wanted my parents to have as serene and loving an ending as possible. Opening my heart (which had shut down through divorce and perhaps life) and accepting the circumstances before me, gave me an opportunity to handle pain, loss, even death, differently.
That’s one of the many examples of being born a Baby Boomer that I love! We question, laugh at, ignore, and change constructs that just don’t make sense to us.